On May 20th, 2014, after twenty-five years together with James Haskins , the State of Pennsylvania called my bluff. I was sitting in a Baja Fresh eating a fish taco when I got a text: “Do I get to be a bridesmaid?” It was from my friend Enrique and I had no idea what was in his snarky little mind with that comment- until I checked the news alerts on my cell phone. A U.S. federal district court judge had ruled that Pennsylvania's statutory ban on recognizing same-sex marriage